Tuesday, July 31, 2012

In London, fortune favours a Jailbird

    In defying magnitude,the Commonwealth Games 2010 Organising Committee chairman, Suresh Kalmadi chose to wipe clean, soiled buttocks from all over the world, with toilet paper that cost $ 80 a roll. As a twist  of 'but(t)s' , relief  came in the form of counting bars in prison, in lieu of counting clean bottoms at leisure. That however did not deter his soiled hindsight from being persistent with legacy.

   The analogy groomed Mr Kalmadi as an expert on all kinds of paper meant to grease palms and hinds alike.Thus the jailbird ventured from tendering toilet paper for the Commonwealth Games 2010 at New Delhi, to selling them during the 2012 Olympics at London.The business model floored the British Parliament,very much like it did floor the Indian house of chaos . Afterall,the English politicians,like their Indian counterparts, were blessed with stiff upper lips and stiffer colonial hips, both which called for an adequate stuffing of the flimsy.
  
  Suresh bhai's hard selling waist liner only added to the bonding spirit of the games. Displayed on bumping bed boards and lumping toilet seats, the language crowned on Kalmadi rolls, a promising competitive feel.It read:-   

'launder the rear for a winning headstart'  

Now which participating country would leave any stone unturned in an effort to taste victory.To say the least, the ablution stone.Not taking a chance, they took to Kalmadi rolls like a fish to water No...a writer to paper !!! $ 80 is a small price to pay for national pride.

  So what if in his own country, the jailbird's travel jaunt set to peak the mountain of shame,has been castrated by judicial jurisprudence ? In London,the sporting community stood impressed (and clean of course).Danny Boyle promised to pay tribute to the cloud kissing price of the rolls in his next big performance.The British Monarchy have sc'rolls' of honour being readied to be bestowed on the Commonwealth Games 2010 organising committee. As for our man of the moment, Mr Kalmadi...Knighthood is only a 'roll' away.  $ 80 anyone ? 

6 comments:

  1. It should have been Kalmadi coming down from the helicopter with the Queen.

    Too bad India rejected his plea to attend the Olympics :-)

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    1. Kalmadi has certainly been brought down, what remains to be seen is, if justice will keep him down where he belongs.

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  2. Flooring them bottoms up huh ! like the pigtail lookalike shackles :)

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    1. Mami...If pigtails could serve as shackles,bottoms would be constantly floored. :D

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    2. Me likes that about pigtails being shackles :P

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    3. Mami...Kalmadi is from your state, Shackle him :D

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